Santa baby, just slip a Snuggie under the tree, for me
I've been a semi-good girl
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight (or since our fireplace is closed, I'll just leave the door open, mmmkay?)
Santa baby, you've got some liquor there in your arm, Boone's Farm
I'll get some red Solo cups
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight(or since our fireplace is closed, you can leave the booze on the front step)
So much reality TV that I've missed
Think of all the mailmen that I haven't kissed
Next year I'll be oh so good
And if I don't get gifts I'm gonna be pissed
Santa honey, I want HDTV to watch Sandra Lee
I've been on Xanax all year
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight (screw the chimney, just ring the doorbell but for god's sake don't wake up my kid or there will be hell to pay!)
Santa cutie, there's one thing I really require, it's dire
Kate Gosselin's hairdo but higher!
Santa cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight (and bring a hairdresser with you, I totally need her haircut, it's SO CUTE!)
Santa baby, subscriptions to The National Enquirer, and US
and In Touch, that's not too much.
Santa baby, just hurry down the chimney tonight (don't come till after Tyra is over, though)
Come and see my trailer shine
With decorations from the Wal-Mart's on Route 9
I really do believe in you
And if the neighbors see you I'll whip out my .22
Santa baby, forgot to mention maybe a tat
How's that?
A rose with "Santa Da Man"
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight
Hurry down the chimney tonight (Or just walk in, the screen door's busted anyway)
Hurry down the chimney tonight (watch out for the pit bull, he ain't friendly)
Hurry down the chimney tonight.
